Ways to Learn Faster, Deeper, and Better

“I will study and prepare myself and someday I know my chance will come”. – Abraham Lincoln.

  If someone granted you one wish, what do you imagine you would want out of life that you haven't gotten yet? For many people, it would be self-improvement and knowledge. New knowledge is the backbone of society's progress. Great thinkers such as Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, Benjamin Franklin, Leonardo da Vinci, Aristotle, and others' quests for knowledge have led society to many of the marvels we are enjoying today. Your quest for knowledge doesn't have to be as Earth-changing as Einstein's, but it can be an important part of your life, leading to a new job, better pay, a new hobby, or simply knowledge for knowledge's sake — whatever is important to you as an end goal.

Life-changing knowledge does typically require advanced learning techniques. In fact, it's been said that the average adult only uses 10% of his/her brain. Imagine what we may be capable of with more advanced learning techniques. Here are tips related to knowledge and learning to help you on your quest. A few are specifically for students in traditional learning institutions the rest for self-starters, or those learning on their own.

Hints To Learn and Recall Effectively

Health: healthy life bring about healthyremembrance. To learn effectively and be able to recall all that you read, then you must learn to stay healthy. If you’re trying to be healthful, but are having a hard time navigating complicated diets, try this hack to simplify things. Limit yourself to non-packaged foods. Eat only seven things: fruits, veggies, whole grains, lean protein, lean calcium, beans, nuts, good fats.   

Eat breakfast. A lot of people skip breakfast, but creativity is often optimal in the early morning and it helps to have some protein in you to feed your brain. A lack of protein can actually cause headaches.

 Eat a light lunch. Heavy lunches have a tendency to make people drowsy. While you could turn this to your advantage by taking a "thinking nap". most people haven't learned how.

Shake a leg. Lack of blood flow is a common reason for lack of concentration. If you've been sitting in one place for awhile, bounce one of your legs for a minute or two. It gets your blood flowing and sharpens both concentration and recall.

Reduce stress and depression. Stress and depression may reduce the ability to recall information and thus inhibit learning. Sometimes, all you need to reduce depression is more white light and fewer refined foods. 

 Balance's

    Dr. Maxwell Maltzwrote about in his book Psycho-Cybernetics about a man who was paid good money to come up with ideas. He would lock his office door, close the blinds, turn off the lights. He'd focus on the problem at hand, then take a short nap on a couch. When he awoke, he usually had the problem solved. 

Take a break. Change physical or mental perspective to lighten the invisible stress that can sometimes occur when you sit in one place too long, focused on learning. Taking a 5-15 minute break every hour during study sessions is more beneficial than non-stop study. It gives your mind time to relax and absorb information. If you want to get really serious with breaks, try a 20 minute ultradian break as part of every 90 minute cycle. This includes a nap break, which is for a different purpose. 
Take a hike. Changing your perspective often relieves tension, thus freeing your creative mind. Taking a short walk around the neighborhood may help.

Change your focus. Sometimes there simply isn't enough time to take a long break. If so, change subject focus. Alternate between technical and non-technical subjects. 

 Perspective and Focus

Change your focus, There are three primary ways to learn: visual, kin esthetic, and auditory. If one isn't working for you, try another. 
Do walking meditation. If you're taking a hike, go one step further and learn walking meditation as a way to tap into your inner resources and you strengthen your ability to focus. Just make sure you're not walking inadvertently into traffic.

Focus and immerse yourself. Focus on whatever you're studying. Don't try to watch TV at the same time or worry yourself about other things or operating your phone why studying. Anxiety does not make for absorption of information and ideas.

Turn out the lights. This is a way to focus, if you are not into meditating. Sit in the dark, block out extraneous influences. This is ideal for learning kin-esthetically, such as guitar chord changes.

 Recall Techniques

Listen to music. Researchers have long shown that certain types of musicare a great "key" for recalling memories. Information learned while listening to a particular song or collection can often be recalled simply by "playing" the songs mentally. 
 Speed read. Some people believe that speed reading causes you to miss vital information. The fact remains that efficient speed reading results in filtering out irrelevant information. If necessary, you can always read and re-read at slower speeds. Slow reading actually hinders the ability to absorb general ideas. (Although technical subjects often require slower reading.) If you're reading online, you can try the free SpreederWeb-based application.

Use acronyms and other mnemonic devices. Mnemonicsare essentially tricks for remembering information. Some tricks are so effective that proper application will let you recall loads of mundane information years later. 
 

 Visual Aids

Every picture tells a story. Draw or sketch whatever it is you are trying to achieve. Having a concrete goal in mind helps you progress towards that goal.Brain map it. Need to plan something? Brain maps, or mind maps, offer a compact way to get both an overview of a project as well as easily add details. With mind maps, you can see the relationships between disparate ideas and they can also act as a receptacle for a brainstorming session.

Learn symbolism and semiotics. Semiotics is the study of signs and symbols. Having an understanding of the symbols of a particular discipline aids in learning, and also allows you to record information more efficiently.

Use information design. When you record information that has an inherent structure, applying information design helps convey that information more clearly. A great resource is Information Aesthetics, which gives examples of information design and links to their sources.

 Verbal and Auditory Techniques

Brainstorm. This is a time-honored technique that combines verbal activity, writing, and collaboration. (One person can brainstorm, but it's more effective in a group.) It's fruitful if you remember some simple rules: Firstly, don't shut anyone's idea out. Secondly, don't "edit" in progress; just record all ideas first, then dissect them later. Participating in brainstorming helps assess what you already know about something, and what you didn't know.  

Kin esthetic Techniques

Write, don't type. While typing your notes into the computer is great for posterity, writing by hand stimulates ideas. The simple act of holding and using a pen or pencil massages acupuncture points in the hand, which in turn stimulates ideas.Carry a quality notebook at all times. Samuel Taylor Coleridge dreamed the words of the poem "In Xanadu (did Kubla Khan)...". Upon awakening, he wrote down what he could recall, but was distracted by a visitor and promptly forgot the rest of the poem. Forever. If you've been doing "walking meditation" or any kind of meditation or productive napping, ideas may suddenly come to you. Record them immediately.Organize. Use sticky colored tabs to divide up a notebook or journal. They are a great way to partition ideas for easy referral.Use post-it notes. Post-it notes provide a helpful way to record your thoughts about passages in books without defacing them with ink or pencil marks. 

Self-Motivation Techniques

Give yourself credit. Ideas are actually a dime a dozen. If you learn to focus your mind on what results you want to achieve, you'll recognize the good ideas. Your mind will become a filter for them, which will motivate you to learn more.Motivate yourself. Why do you want to learn something? What do want to achieve through learning? If you don't know why you want to learn, then distractions will be far more enticing.Set a goal. W. Clement Stone once said "Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe it can achieve." It's an amazing phenomenon in goal achievement. Prepare yourself by whatever means necessary, and hurdles will seem surmountable. Anyone who has experienced this phenomenon understands its validity.Think positive. There's no point in setting learning goals for yourself if you don't have any faith in your ability to learn.Every skill is learned. With the exception of bodily functions, everyskill in life is learned. Generally speaking, if one person can learn something, so can you. It may take you more effort, but if you've set a believable goal, it's likely an achievable goal. Prepare yourself for learning. Thinking positive isn't sufficient for successfully achieving goals. This is especially important if you are an adult, as you'll probably have many distractions surrounding your daily life. Implement ways to reduce distractions, at least for a few hours at a time, else learning will become a frustrating experience.Human nature is such that not everyone in your life will be a well-wisher in your self-improvement and learning plans. They may intentionally or subconsciously distract you from your goal. If you have classes to attend after work, make sure that work colleagues know this, that you are unable to work late. Diplomacy works best if you think your boss is intentionally giving you work on the days he/she knows you have to leave. Reschedule lectures to a later time slot if possible/ necessary.Constrain yourself. Most people need structure in their lives. Freedom is sometimes a scary thing. It's like chaos. But even chaos has order within. By constraining yourself — say giving yourself deadlines, limiting your time on an idea in some manner, or limiting the tools you are working with — you can often accomplish more in less time

Before You Say I Do! - Preparing for Marriages

 
THE ESSENCE OF RELATIONSHIP:

Relationship is designed for assistance! (Gen 2:18) assistance in pursuance of vision! If you go into a relationship because you need someone to sponsor your expenses, you are in error – and you should be avoided. 

You don’t need a relationship so you could get new clothes, or to take care of your basic needs – if you do that, you would have gotten a sponsor not a real mate, and you sure would have to compromise your emotions and principles to stay in that relationship.

 If getting an opportunity or platform is your reason for entering into a relationship, you would fail miserably in that relationship.

 Simply think of ways to be self-sufficient and you would be respected and regarded greatly for that – refuse to be a liability – because being a a liability shows you are of an unsound mind, it reveals your inability to think, it means you are a load to be carried. 

Being dependent really has many disadvantages. 

          Although relationship is not about fun alone, it’s about responsibility – but trying to meat your financial needs should not be the foundational reasons of entering into a relationship – if you do this, abuse is inevitable.

Relationship is about adding value (not sex or burden) to your partner’s life. One sure thing that will be detrimental to any relationship is thinking you can change someone or mold them to your own liking.

 Worse yet is trying to change who you are so that they will accept you. Understanding the essence of relationship which is to help each other fulfill his/her purpose is the secret to a successful relationship.

          For any relationship to grow/work learning to open your heart to be love and to love is the first step. There will never be a guarantee that everything will fall into place right away there will be spark at first but the fire will only grow deeper when its rekindle daily. 

     

Sex outside marital boundaries kills one major ingredient for successful marriage. The fire of sex is meant in the fire place of marriage outside there if you try it you all get burnt. 

Your ability to trust die bit after bit when you engage in extramarital relationships. Sex outside marriage doesn’t strengthen love bond really, it only creates additions and destructive appetites. Sex is what waiting for!

 So the criteria for entering into a relationship is first discover your purpose, your purpose has the capacity to employ you for a life time, men of purpose are always tight because they always has something to do, it’s important you marry for your future than for pleasure. Your future is important, so have a purpose for your life before entering into an intimate relationship.

 Learn how to do something to solve problem i.e. use what you have to solve problem.

Secondly, know the definition of love –, love is a matter of choice. So many people don’t know what the definition of love is, there are many unnecessary heartbreak today because they don’t know what love is all about. What is love? When somebody say I love you what does it mean? I love you of agape? Or which type of love? 

When someone say I love you does it mean, I like your difference, or I like your too cute? You can’t love someone you don’t know, you can’t love someone whose assets and liability you cannot define,because eventually love does not just stop at emotion, love is a chain. love is responsibility! love is a trust. Love does not take the dignity and pride of other person, love is patient.

Thirdly, you must know how to customize yourself  to make money, you make money from other people ignorance, you cannot pay for what you already has, if you understand the law of potential difference you will know how to make money. Potential is ability, your ability! 

The difference in our ability is potential so as I give you what you want from me, I take reward from you. You make money out of other people’s ignorance! 

Fourthly, learn to look at the beauty in others: no one is perfect, not even you. In other words no Mr and Miss perfect in this world (earth), except in heaven. Only when you are able to accept someone for who they are will you find happiness. 

If you are not perfect stop looking for someone who is perfect. ‘you don’t love someone because they are perfect, you love them in spit of the fact that they are not.’ -  Jod Picon.

Five: we have what we call, “God approve choice” in relationship. Simply seek for God’s choice for you – someone that can compliment you, someone who has certain things you are lacking working for him or her. Having someone who has a good amount of temper could be good for someone who has no temper at all. Value his or her uniqueness and help sharpen it. 

Six: look for compatibility, the Biro and its cover are two different items but because they are compatible, they can compliment each other. Compliment is the real deal. So don’t go looking for a partner who is just like you or someone you can covert to be exactly like you.

 Compatibility! There is no bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh anywhere! Adam is the only one who could talk of a bone of his bone. If one can talk the other can listen you are compatible.

Seven: one quality/characteristics that must not be missing in choosing a life partner is ‘the fear of God’. If this is missing, everything is missing. Only the fear of God can sustain love, happy family and teach the knowledge of life. 

Go for someone who has great respect and regard for the things of God and ultimately submits to the word of God which is able to change all things including man’s heart. If he/she fear God he/she will love you/submit as God commands. 

Finally, I’ll say there are no experts in relationship. No magic in perfect relationship, no formulas. Be ready to learn from people who are already there and study books and material on marriage and family life. When you read and study material you all know what marriage is all about.

“The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him,  and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man  to put away his wife for every cause?  And he answered and said unto them,  Have ye not read…” (matt 19:3-4).                                                                                                    So studying is a tool to fulfilling marriage.

Marriage is a journey that you have not travel before you need to connect with people that have pass in the same road to know how to go for it successfully. Jesus said have you not read…He expected them to have read. 
 

If you must succeed in marriage you must prepared for it, the marriage you don’t prepared for will confuse you when you get there. It is your preparation that determine you experience. You don’t prepared in marriage you prepared for marriage!

 There is no other time to prepared for marriage other than when you are in youth/single. The time as a single is a very unique season of your life that God has given you and it is primary for preparation. 

Every successful marriage, every fulfilling marriage is a product of adequate preparation. This is the best time to get ready. You don’t learn how to shut gun in the battle front you learn it before the battle begin otherwise you become a victim. “When preparation meet with opportunity result came to successes”. 

There is no accidental success in marriage, every marriage that is succeeding today is adequately prepared for. 

I’m not an expert but these lesson I learned from carefully studying people who are successful in marriage. I hope it can help you too. 

Did I miss anything? Please do share with me by leaving a comment. I love to hear from you.

Dating

  
Dating is a form of courtshipconsisting of social activities done by two people with the aim of each assessing the other's suitability as a partner in an intimate relationship or as a spouse. 

While the term has several meanings, it usually refers to the act of meeting and engaging in some mutually agreed upon social activity in public, together, as a couple.

The protocols and practices of dating, and the terms used to describe it, vary considerably from country to country. 

The most common idea is two people trying out a relationship and exploring whether they are compatible by going out together in public as a couple who may or may not yet be having sexual relations.

 This period of courtship is sometimes seen as a precursor to engagement or marriage.

Different meaning of the term

       In some part of the world they use hookup; Teenagers and college-aged students tend to avoid the more formal activity of dating, and prefer casual no-strings-attached experiments sometimes described as hookups.

 It permits young women to "go out and fit into the social scene, get attention from young men, and learn about sexuality", according to one report by sociologists.  

The term hookupcan describe a wide variety of behavior ranging from kissing to non-genital touching to make-out sessions; according to one report, only about one third of people had sexual intercourse. 

A contrary report, however, suggested there has been no "sea change" in sexual behavior regarding college students from 1988 onwards, and that the term hookup itself continued to be used to describe a variety of relationships, including merely socializing or passionate kissing as well as sexual intercourse.

Muslims living in the United States can choose whether to use traditional Islamic methods, or date American-style; Muslims choosing to stick to Islamic tradition can "only marry another Muslim", according to one Malaysian account.

Mosques have been known to try to bring people together––one in California has a dating service for Muslims.

While the term dating has many meanings, the most common refers to a trial period in which two people explore whether to take the relationship further towards a more permanent relationship; in this sense, dating refers to the time when people are physically together in public as opposed to the earlier time period in which people are arranging the date, perhaps by corresponding by email or text or phone. 
 
Another meaning of the term dating is to describe a stage in a person's life when he or she is actively pursuing romantic relationships with different people.

 If two unmarried celebrities are seen in public together, they are often described as "dating" which means they were seen in public together, and it is not clear whether they are merely friends, exploring a more intimate relationship, or are romantically involved.

From the perspective of the history of humans in civilization, dating as an institution is a relatively recent phenomenon which has mainly emerged in the last few centuries.

 From the standpoint of anthropology and sociology, dating is linked with other institutions such as marriage and the family which have also been changing rapidly and which have been subject to many forces, including advances in technology and medicine. 

As humans have evolved from the hunter-gatherers into civilized societies and more recently into modern societies, there have been substantial changes in the relationship between men and women, with perhaps the only biological constant being that both adult women and men must have sexual intercourse for human procreation to happen.

In the twentieth century, dating was sometimes seen as a precursor to marriage but it could also be considered as an end-in-itself, that is, an informal social activity akin to friendship. 

It generally happened in that portion of a person's life before the age of marriage, but as marriage became less permanent with the advent of divorce, dating could happen at other times in peoples lives as well.

 People became more mobile. Rapidly developing technology played a huge role; new communication technology such as the telephone, Internet and text messaging enabled dates to be arranged without face-to-face contact. 

Cars extended the range of dating as well as enabled back-seat sexual exploration. In the mid twentieth century, the advent of birth control as well as safer procedures for abortion changed the equation considerably, and there was less pressure to marry as a means for satisfying sexual urges.

 New types of relationships formed; it was possible for people to live together without marrying and without having to deal with children. 

Information about human sexuality grew, and with it an acceptance of all types of sexual orientations is becoming more common. 

Today, the institution of dating continues to evolve at a rapid rate with new possibilities and choices opening up.

Dating as a social relationship

          Social rules regarding dating vary considerably according to variables such as country, social class, religion, age, sexual orientation and gender. Behavior patterns are generally unwritten and constantly changing.

 There are considerable differences between social and personal values.

 Each culture has particular patterns which determine such choices as whether the man asks the woman out, where people might meet, whether kissing is acceptable on a first date, the substance of conversation, who should pay for meals or entertainment, or whether splitting expenses is allowed.

 Among the Kare people in Burma and Thailand, women are expected to write love poetry and give gifts to win over the man. Since dating can be a stressful situation, there is the possibility of humor to try to reduce tensions. 

For example, director Blake Edwards wanted to date singing star Julie Andrews, and he joked in parties about her persona by saying that her "endlessly cheerful governess" image from movies such as Mary Poppins and The Sound of Music gave her the image of possibly having "lilacs for pubic hair"; Andrews appreciated his humor, sent him lilacs, dated him and later married him, and the couple stayed together for 41 years.

REASON FOR DATING

        One of the main purposes of dating is for two or more people to evaluate one another suitability as a long term companion or spouse. 

Often physical characteristics, personality, financial status, and other aspects of the involved persons are judged and as a result feelings can be hurt, and confidence shaken. Because of the uncertainty of the whole situation, the desire to be acceptable to the other person, and the possibility of rejection, dating can be very stressful for all parties involved.

While some of what happens on a date is guided by an understanding of basic rules, there is considerable room to experiment, and there are numerous sources of advice available. Sources of advice include magazine articles, self-help books, dating coaches, friends, and many other sources.

  And the advice given can pertain to all facets of dating, including such aspects as where to go, what to say, what not to say, what to wear, how to end a date, how to flirt, and differing approaches regarding first dates versus subsequent dates.  

 In addition, advice can apply to periods before a date, such as how to meet prospective partners, as well as after a date, such as how to break off a relationship.

Frequency of dating varies by person and situation; among singles actively seeking partners, 36% had been on no dates in the past three months, 13% had one date, 22% had two to four dates and 25% had five or more dates, according to a 2005 U.S. survey.

WHERE TO MEET A DATES

      There are numerous ways to meet potential dates, including blind dates, classified ads, dating websites, hobbies, holidays, office romance, social networking, speed dating, and others. 

A Pew study in 2005 which examined Internet users in long-term relationships including marriage, found that many met by contacts at work or at school. 

The survey found that 55% of relationship-seeking singles agreed that it was "difficult to meet people where they live." One writer suggested that meeting possible partners was easier in pedestrian-oriented cities.

Work is a common place to meet potential spouses, although there are some indications that the Internet is overtaking the workplace as an introduction venue. Some couples met because they lived in the same building and shared a common bathroom. Hobbies can be an informal way for people to meet.

 In Britain, one in five mary a co-worker, but half of all workplace romances end within three months. In India, there are incidents of people meeting future spouses in the workplace. One drawback of office dating is that a bad date can lead to "workplace awkwardness.

Gender differences

There is general perception that men and women approach dating differently, hence the reason why advice for each sex varies greatly, particularly when dispensed by popular magazines. 

For example, it is a common belief that heterosexual men often seek women based on beauty and youth.  Psychology researchers at the University of Michigan suggested that men prefer women who seem to be "malleable and awed", and prefer younger women with subordinate jobs such as secretaries and assistants and fact-checkers rather than executive-type women. 

  Online dating patterns suggest that men are more likely to initiate online exchanges (over 75%) and extrapolate that men are less "choosy", seek younger women, and "cast a wide net".

 In a similar vein, the stereotype for heterosexual women is that they seek well-educated men who are their age or older with high-paying jobs.  Evolutionary psychology suggests that "women are the choosier of the genders" since "reproduction is a much larger investment for women" who have "more to lose by making bad choices.

Love

     If there is any aspect of dating which is common for both sexes, then perhaps the idea of being in love can be scary; one said "being really intimate with someone in a committed sense is kind of threatening" and described love as "the most terrifying thing." 

In her Psychology Today column, research scientist, sex columnist and book author Debby Herbenick compared it to a roller coaster:

There's something wonderful, I think, about taking chances on love and sex. ... Going out on a limb can be roller-coaster scary because none of us want to be rejected or to have our heart broken. But what if that happens? I, for one, would rather fall flat on my face as I serenade my partner (off-key and all) in a bikini and a short little pool skirt than sit on the edge of the pool, dipping my toes in silence.

One dating adviser agreed that love is risky, and wrote that "There is truly only one real danger that we must concern ourselves with and that is closing our hearts to the possibility that love exists."

Stranger danger

      Since people dating often don't know each other well, there's the risk of violence, including date rape. According to one report, there was a 10% chance of violence between students happening between a boyfriend and girlfriend, sometimes described as "intimate partner violence", over a 12–month period. Another estimate was that 20% of U.S. high school girls aged 14–18 were "hit, slapped, shoved or forced into sexual activity".  

There is evidence that violence while dating isn't limited to any one culture or group or religion, but that it remains an issue in different countries.  

 It is usually the female who is the victim, but there have been cases where males have been hurt as well. Sara McCorquodale suggests that women meeting strangers on dates meet initially in busy public places, share details of upcoming dates with friends or family so they know where they'll be and who they'll be with, avoid revealing one's surname or address, and conducting searches on them on the Internet prior to the date. 

One advisor suggested: Don't leave drinks unattended; have an exit plan if things go badly; and ask a friend to call you on your cell phone an hour into the date to ask how it's going. Kadyrov advised:

If you explain beautifully, a woman does not look to see whether you are handsome or not -- but listens more, so you can win her heart. That is why I advise our boys to read stories and watch movies more and to learn more beautiful phrases to tell girls. —Ramzan Kadyrov, 2010.

Technology

       The internet and several websites are shaping the way new generations date. Facebook, Skype, Whatsapp, and other applications like Lulu and Grindr have made remote connections possible. Particularly for the LGBTI community, where the dating pool can be more difficult to navigate because of discrimination and having a 'minority' status in society, online dating tools are an alternate way to meet potential dates. 

New software applications such as Grindr has also provided a means for gays to meet with other gays in close proximity.

‘By waiting and waiting and waiting to commit to someone, our capacity for love shrinks and withers. 

This doesn't mean that women or men should marry the first reasonable person to come along, or someone with whom they are not in love. But we should, at a much earlier age than we do now, take a serious attitude toward dating and begin preparing ourselves to settle down. 

For it's in the act of taking up the roles we've been taught to avoid or postpone––wife, husband,  mother, father––that we build our identities, expand our lives, and achieve the fullness of character we desire.’ —Danielle Crittenden, 1999.